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WiLD Bunch Mornings

Opinion: The Best Halloween Candy

Author Budman

Opinion: The Best Halloween Candy

With so many options of candy to dish out at Halloween, there really is only one worth your time. At least according to your Friendly Neighborhood Budman…

Reese’s peanut butter cups are the only Halloween treat that I will ever truly enjoy.  Of course, I like to nerd out on comic books, but I don’t like to eat Nerds. Although I have many buddies, Mike and Ike are not among them. I also adore the universe, but I have no desire to visit Mars or the Milky Way. If you ask me if I enjoy laughing, I will say yes, but I don’t need the extra Snickers.

Now that Halloween is here, all I want is Reese’s peanut butter cups. For a few reasons. First, I know that a classic Reeses isn’t going to harm my jawbone like some other candies.

Champion Candy:

A smooth Reeses chocolate-peanut butter cup won’t pull the filling from my teeth. Should I worry that eating too many could give me a cavity? Maybe. However, I brush my teeth. Certainly, it will cause my blood sugar to soar, but to be absolutely honest, the journey is well worth it. I’m not going to let that rent space in my head. I got ten toes… So I lose a few someday. Worth it.

Because Reese’s peanut butter cup is the best there is. I also enjoy all the new flavors too. I like large cups. The miniature cups are cute too. Did you know that some varieties of Reeses now contain potato chips? I indulge in those as well.  Just know that when I visit your area for Halloween, I’ll be looking for Reese’s peanut butter cups.

Have the Best Halloween:

I promise won’t be dipping into that bowl on the porch that’s filled with Starburst and says, “Help yourself.”
On Halloween, I’m just seeking one thing—Reese’s peanut butter cup delights. Some people dislike the combination of peanut butter and chocolate; these people are likely psychopaths. Those people probably don’t enjoy things like FUN or things like making tender love on a Friday night. Also, I need this in my life…

 

Honestly, who doesn’t enjoy Reeses? So please, give those kids some Reeses this Halloween. Spread some peanut butter love! Don’t just do it for your neighborhood Budman. Do it for the children! That way I can trade them for all those Starbursts I took from that help-yourself bowl!

Budman's Top 5 Halloween Safety Tips

Halloween is almost here! So get ready to have some scary fun, but remember to do it safely. Here are some Halloween safety tips from your friendly neighborhood Budman.

  • Tip #1

    Make sure that you have a flashlight handy. They are a must have for trick or treating on Halloween night. Not only are ghosts and the undead afraid of flashlights, but they also let drivers see you walking around in your ninja costumes.

  • Tip #2

    Here’s another important tip, parents should stay with their kids at all times! Especially if your teenager is trying to leave the house with a backpack full of toilet paper and shaving cream. Keep your eyes on that kid.

  • Tip #3

    While watching out for teenage vandals, try to stay on the sidewalks and wear reflective tape. I know you’re dressed like Batman and you’re vengeance. But it’s nighttime and you’re dressed like a black bat. Some joker not paying attention while driving could hit you. Remember, Batman’s only super powers are that he’s rich, and with the rising cost of health care, why risk it?

  • Tip #4

    Another important tip is only walk up to well lit homes. You know that house with the all the lights off, overgrown grass and the hurricane shutters down? Yeah. Don’t go there. Chances are they don’t have any candy for you and are likely “registered” weirdos.

  • Tip #5

    Most importantly, check your kids’ candy. Not just for razor blades, but you would be surprised how many people confuse Sour Patch Kids candy for Stoney Patch Kids edibles.
    Weed candy and actual candy labels look similar enough to confuse you and the person high enough to place it in your kid’s candy bag.
    If you find any THC candies, remove them from the Halloween bag immediately and keep them out of reach of children. Maybe place them in your sock drawer until new year’s eve.

Meet Budman, dynamic host of Marconi Award winning radio station WXKB's WiLD Bunch Morning Show, on B1039. Budman likes to write about funny news, a good Florida man story, stupid criminals or anything involving a superhero. Budman, a comic book and pop culture enthusiast, even named his daughter Kara Zor-El, after Supergirl. His only child is his true passion beyond the mic. Being a dad is his favorite role. Budman, a true family man, balances his love for radio with quality time spent with loved ones and his trusty dogs.

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